El DeBarge, one of my favorite R&B artists, has a song called "The Other Side." I really love this song because it's so hauntingly beautiful and honest. This song has a sadness that also pulls you into, what feel like, madness of the not happy side of love.
I am pretty certain that I am not the only person in this world that has experienced the other side. It's the two sides of the same coin we are dealing with when it comes to love.
For romantic love, you will hurt and I do believe that you wouldn't hurt so much if you didn't pour your heart into loving someone. We want perfect love and because everyone interpretation of "perfect love" varies, we will never attain that which we chase so we learn to compromise but I believe that there is the point where compromise and self destruction meet. Since there is no perfect human love we itemize the things we can deal with and the things that are deal breakers when it comes to relationships. Funny thing is the more you love someone, the more the deal breakers diminish but at some point you look at how disproportionated your itemized list is and you may ask yourself "Where am I?"
We lose ourselves when we love someone so much that the only justification for staying or continuing to love is "we are human". Well, in our humanity, we are flawed and when in love our flaws are magnified. Where do you think most to all of the arguments in relationships originate from? A pointed out or acknowledged flaw or disagreement. A disagreement is not only a difference of opinion but one party basically feeling that the other party is flawed in their judgment or frame of thinking.
WE ARE NOT PERFECT! Other than God, there is not other perfect love.
Humanity has the capacity to save you or destroy that which defines it; YOU, ME. US. We are ever growing in what we think, feel and how we handle life. Love will never cease as long as we remain human. As wonderful as love can be, it can be equally debilitating to one's own heart. Some people think that heartbreak or ache is just emotion or psychological. When your heart breaks, something very real breaks in you and you can even feel it physically. Heartache is a real feeling that can make you lose your break or pass out, throw up, get headaches and many other things. For some people, the other side comes much too often and they can't fathom a good love; just the other side.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Monday, August 8, 2011
The Weight of the World
There are moments when you find yourself in a place of seclusion. In this place you find that every thought you think has about 5 more thought tacked onto that thought. These overwhelming thoughts snowball out of control until you can't see a solution for any particular problem but you see a blog where no matter what direction you attempt to tackle first, seeking a resolution, you still tend to buckle, stop and ask yourself "What am I doing?"
Well, in all that could go wrong and may go wrong in my life, I try not to wait until the weight of life overwhelms me to get my bearings or to get clarity on what I am trying to do. You have to take time for yourself, daily. May not be hours of time to sit and think about your next steps in a general sense but you can take 5 minutes to say "Okay, where am I and what's next?"
For example, bills
Don't look at everything and say I can't pay all this now and start to worry. Know in advance, 'Bite sizes" and you will feel like you are moving forward instead of sitting in a pile of "I can't" and letting it eat you up.
Every aspect of our lives has the capacity to overwhelm us and sometimes it's unavoidable but worry is just panicking about something that may not even happen or something that is beyond your capabilities to handle. Unless you are apart of the 1% of people who are so wealthy that most days they don't have a care about money, you will have issues with money and that alone is stressful but you have to know that good and bad times fluctuate so find so acknowledge when something is beyond your ability and let it go or turn it over to someone who can help you. Even if someone doesn't pour millions of dollars into your hands, they can get you through the emotional, psychological and mental struggles that will help you deal.
You know, the thing about loving yourself is that when you do, you don't want worry for yourself just as you wouldn't want someone else you love to worry. Care about yourself just as you would care about someone you really love. There is nothing wrong with that. God loves us more than enough and knowing that He cares should make you want to care more about what he cares for. That's my blah blah blah for the day. Until next time, loved ones, learn something new today and if you don't at least teach someone else something new.
Love
Well, in all that could go wrong and may go wrong in my life, I try not to wait until the weight of life overwhelms me to get my bearings or to get clarity on what I am trying to do. You have to take time for yourself, daily. May not be hours of time to sit and think about your next steps in a general sense but you can take 5 minutes to say "Okay, where am I and what's next?"
For example, bills
- What bills do I have?
- What is my priority?
- What can I pay now?
Don't look at everything and say I can't pay all this now and start to worry. Know in advance, 'Bite sizes" and you will feel like you are moving forward instead of sitting in a pile of "I can't" and letting it eat you up.
Every aspect of our lives has the capacity to overwhelm us and sometimes it's unavoidable but worry is just panicking about something that may not even happen or something that is beyond your capabilities to handle. Unless you are apart of the 1% of people who are so wealthy that most days they don't have a care about money, you will have issues with money and that alone is stressful but you have to know that good and bad times fluctuate so find so acknowledge when something is beyond your ability and let it go or turn it over to someone who can help you. Even if someone doesn't pour millions of dollars into your hands, they can get you through the emotional, psychological and mental struggles that will help you deal.
You know, the thing about loving yourself is that when you do, you don't want worry for yourself just as you wouldn't want someone else you love to worry. Care about yourself just as you would care about someone you really love. There is nothing wrong with that. God loves us more than enough and knowing that He cares should make you want to care more about what he cares for. That's my blah blah blah for the day. Until next time, loved ones, learn something new today and if you don't at least teach someone else something new.
Love
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