Can a sister get a future?

It's 3am and I have a lot on my mind. Today has been quite a roller coaster.  I think the initial feelings of anger have subsided and the feelings of disappointment of the last week has settled. I decided to start this chapter of my life by saying "Yes" more.  I have joined a gym and went to my first zumba fitness class. I was excited to do something I hadn't done before. I have Zumba at home but hadn't been to a class. It was quite intense. After I finished the class, I found myself to be more emotional than I thought I'd be.

This journey will be a long one and not an easy one but I'm willing to do what I have to do to be happy.  As I left the gym, I caught the bus with two others in my Zumba class  and had a very inspirational conversation with a woman who has been working hard with her weight loss and it encouraged me to stick with it. I'm excited.

I have felt like I've been wandering around the city in the haze for the last week. There was time for me to assess my next move. I plan to travel. I looked at my passport and the last international stamp was in June 2004. I'm overdue for a trip. I usually rely on having someone else to go with me. I'm learning that I have to just go where I need to or want to go even if some places I'll have to go alone. I will probably recruit my sister. Finding work, finishing my books, finding a place to live are my priorities. People kept asking me over the last few years if I was still planning to move to NY. We'll see.

I just want everyone to be happy and in my effort to make others happy, I have neglected my own happiness.  To be honest, I was very happy many days but there is an overall quality of life that I didn't focus on.  I am responsible for my joy. When you assign responsibility for your happiness to someone else they can and most times will let you down. I am responsible for my joy. My joy is my own. Tonight, I have an eerily peaceful disposition. I was in love. I am still in love however, I have to shift the object of my affection back to my heart and my gifts God has given me to be successful. I choose prosperity.

I don't know how new friends will play into my future since I don't have much trust in people anymore so this will be challenging for me. As always, I have to step up to my challenge. We'll see where I go.  I have also decided that my "woe is me" blogs are done for this season of heartbreak. lol. I will be more uplifting and happy from this point on. Real life requires real perspective on our circumstances and life happens but you don't have to let it keep you down.  In the eternal words of James Brown, "E'vrybody get up! (get on up)"

I'm up now LET'S GO GET IT!!!

RLRR...
B@PEACE
STAY TRU